Okay so I am sitting at the table today with my three year old daughter. We are both "reading..." you know about princesses, talking animals and vampires. Note to self. Branch out...Me a cup of coffee in hand, her a Dora cup with that savory juice water mix that I give her so her teeth don't rot. Ewww! (The backwoods teeth theme to Deliverance being strummed in the background...not the juice concoction). Anyway, I notice her eying my coffee which she does a couple of times a week. At which point I generally remind her that caffeine is for grown ups... Blah blah blah. You know, in that way we copy our parents in a vain attempt to explain that as adults we can do things that are bad for us if we want to. I am quite certain that during such speeches I am transformed into Charlie Brown's teacher. Droning on in my daughter's head .You know, Wahwahwahwwhwahwah....
So she is looking at my coffee the wistful way she looks at my lip gloss collection and says in a voice much like that of Cindy Lou Who's..."Maybe when I am big as you ( one of her favorite games to play)- then I can drink coffee WITH you sometimes.. Not now though because little kids can't have caffeine." When she says things like this it is with that longing tone kids say "I wish I knew what that tastes like -" say when a stranger dares to partake of a cookie in their presence. Precious right? So we have a date, when she is old enough that caffeine won't stunt her growth, she and I will go for coffee- for now she has to settle for watery juice or a milk steamer.
Anyway- this of course brought to mind my coffee passion. Which gave me this idea, which I probably should have given it back. Y'know- "thanks but no thanks.." BUT I didn't. So here it is. Reasons Why Coffee is (Sometimes) More Lovable Than Boys... ( the grown variety) This is not a man hating thing at all... Just that- coffee completes me. Heehee. Atleast before two p.m. After that I complete myself.
1. Coffee is Predictable - in the BEST way.- Made to order. Served steamy hot OR icy cold. Sweet or bitter,smoothe or straightforward. Sophisticated or simple. Haha European, Brazilian, Jamaican...take your pick. Regardless- you know exactly what you're getting because you ordered it that way.
2. Coffee mixes well with your girlfriends and shopping. Need I say more? Also it doesn't remind you that you have fifty MAC shadows at home already and only two eyes to apply it to. Coffee understands.
3. Coffee only wakes you up when you want it to.
4. You can find the perfect cup of joe on the first attempt. No fuss. And at a drive-through no less. Talk about instant gratification.
5. Coffee warms you up whenever asked and doesn't complain that your feet are too cold. And REALLY? Man up. Hypothetically...
6. You give your coffee lip all the time and you never have to worry about starting a nonsensical argument. In fact, it gives you a melty kiss in return. Now if only we could teach it the hair tug.
7. Coffee doesn't interrupt you when you're reading to ask if it has clean socks. Coffee appreciates that while being a woman is a glorious, beautiful, complex and fabulous thing that comes with inmeasurable benefits-being utilized as a tracking device is not one of them. Why can boys NEVER find things again? :) Maybe the Myth Buster team should try to defunct that one- good luck.
8. Coffee is eager to please you...in a Jane Austen Victorian romance kind of way- not in a fetch you your paper kind of way. Awww... When the Internet finishes it's serial slayings of printed media, will puppies fetch I- Macs? Sad visual. What about the Times famous crossword- what will become of that?
9. Coffee is flexible. It doesn't care that you change your mind all the time. Craves it even. It also doesn't balk at being covered in cream, splenda and sugar free syrup. Nothing wrong with that.
10. Java only passes steam and then it smells like peppermint, vanilla or caramel. It doesn't have fingers or laugh afterward. Enough said. Hhmmm.. Coffee really IS fabulous, right?
My Poor Little Bug. Perhaps hot cocoa with pink mashmallows will suffice until she is " big as me." But now... Time for another cup. Mmmmm...;) ;).
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1 comments:
I had a question about "#4. You can find the perfect cup of joe on the first attempt. No fuss. And at a drive-through no less. Talk about instant gratification."
How many cups did you have to have until you found the perfect cup?
Did I just make the list for a non-sensical argument? LOL
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