Club Rules

Do you remember when we were kids how we went through a clubhouse phase?

I THINK clubs and club houses are a gateway to childhood. Not all of us were blessed with a Handy Daddy who whipped us up Bob Villa/Trading Spaces Ty/Andrew/Carson-esque clubhouses out of the spare timber in the garage. Some of us had the kind of Daddy's that sent the car out to have the oil changed, called AAA to change flat tires and used the garage to park the car in and little else. For THOSE of us- the ones that were gifted instead with an obligatory imagination-the "clubhouse" was little more than a large refrigerator box with haphazardly cut windows and doors (due to our horrendous cutting skills- hypothetically.) I mustn't forget to mention the finger painted exterior modelling every hue of pink and red one could devise by mixing, blending and shaking the basically non-fancy four provided options. Add the finishing touch of ten dollars worth of mirrored, sparkly and scratch and sniff stickers purchased from the sticker store (NOT Things Remembered. WAY before scrap-booking was "invented" Think...Units and Merry Go Round, two scrunchies and the Go-gos and if you don't get these allusions-I STILL think you're pretty, just shake your head and say yes). Final addition crusty "grass-like" indoor-outdoor rug from under the garage steps that was dragged to the "door" that busted off shortly after it's creation, as well as every blanket a girl had to her name. Enough about the decor- the key to the club house was the rules.

As every Club Member is well aware, the Club Founder gets to make the rules. There was somewhat of a Democratic process involved. That is if by "Democratic", we are referring to the Club Founder feigning interest in what the CM's have to say and then continuing the vigorous crayola marker scribbling on poster board of what she is CERTAIN are the perfect rules. Things like:

1. The clubhouse is reserved for Club Members.
2. Club Members may only be in the clubhouse when the Club Founder is present.
3. Nothing may be added to/taken from the clubhouse decor without the permission of the Club Founder. This includes Club Members.
4. Play nice-and by nice I mean play what the Club Founder wants to play-when and how she wants it played.
5. Club meets everyday after school that we don't have anything better to do and certainly you wouldn't have ANYTHING better to do.
6. All final decisions on the addition of new Club Members are to be decided by the Club Founder.
7. The Club Founder may singly vote you out of the club for any reason without explanation.
8. The Club Founder may (and often will) alter the club rules at any time without notifying other Club Members. Obviously no vote is necessary. Creative interpretation of any and all rules by the Club Founder is to be expected.

Sounds fun! Right?

There was a little pink am/fm radio that only tuned stations halfway, dancing, bike adventures, the occasional crap (I mean craft) and cookies...so membership had it's privileges...That and the Club Founder was pretty spectacular...(insert evil delusional laugh here).

Suffice to say that the Club House phase of my life was short lived. I have always thought boys were better at this teensy weensy aspect of childhood because of that carefree attitude that so charming in boyhood often translates to cluelessness in adulthood.

Our femininity that radiates silky smooth, shimmery and vulnerable- reacts warrior princessy to our club rules and boundaries being violated. This is due to our deep seeded belief that there IS a right way to do things. Our way.

Think about your old club house rules...

Have any of them changed?

Most of mine remained the same although my club house offers better accommodations/perks smells enrapturingly delicious and my rule delivery has perfected with practice. I SO have them knocking down the door to get in.