June 23, 2009

Ten Indulgences... aka, Pretty,Guilty, Little Pleasures

The word "indulgences" reminds me of History class and Martin Luther...but lets not so much explore the purchasing of souls from purgatory via the Catholic church BECAUSE well, that would be an odd, boring, uninformed topic of convo. Also, I am not Catholic...Rather let's explore the guilty pleasures we allow ourselves that add sweetness (dulce, si?) or shine to our daily existence. I imagine this is probably what would typically come to a person's mind when "indulgence" is mentioned...but I wouldn't know much about that. CLEARLY. Perhaps you indulge in certain foods or beverages,activities,behaviors,movies...the company of shady or adventurous friends possibly?...Could really be any myriad of things.Indulgence could also be depicted as SSB (Secret Single Behavior- via Sex and the City= rituals you engage in when flying solo). So in the spirit of indulgence...here is my top ten. I apologize as some of these are redundant. Admittedly I am all about the small luxuries...not the picture of discipline and deprivation.Yadda, yadda- well covered territory...Could be another reason for my lack of Catholicism.

1. Lip Gloss...let me just add here-eye shadow and mascara. Lip gloss is the only one that I refuse to face my public without(that's a joke-laugh)...but what makes it an indulgence is the fact that it is a small item that brings me infinite bliss...I kid you not...I am not overstating (for once)What else smells decadent, often tastes like frosting, plumps, tingles and comes in endless shades from radiant ruby to pouty plum? Twenty dollars or less is a small price to pay for uninhibited lip bliss. Eye shadow satisfies my undiagnosed bipolar make up moods and mascara in blackest black is a glam necessity. Yet every time I think I am in love with my mascara-a new brush,brand or formula comes along. Tiresome, really. Sorry,but I have to give a quick shout out to lotions and potions... as they fit here as well..."Can't Get Enough of You Baby" (Now I am quoting Smash Mouth lyrics..WHAT happened to them? Hangin' in a bar somewhere with Sugar Ray and Spin Doctors-eatin' fish tacos, drinkin Mexican beer? I like to think so...oh-add Robert VanWinkle to the equation).

2. Reality Television- Everyone claims to hate it, but I (not so)secretly think you're all in the RTV closet...IF I WERE the only one watching- it wouldn't be all that's on the tube...From Idol, to DWTS, Project Runway to ANTM...I am mildly addicted. And I find the lack of mental commitment intoxicating. Keep Fox and CNN for yourself - my TV brings me shallow uninformed joy. I can catch the news in two minutes on the Google homepage and not feel like poking myself in the eye with the remote. To clarify: I am not celebrating ignorance. I just think that it is possible to stay informed without delving in the depressing and sinister ...

3. Coca Cola and if I REALLY want to indulge? Cherry Coke with real cherries...there are strict rules involved. Maybe rules is wrong. Standards? Will spare you the details. This is a controlled habit because I gave up diet years ago. Too many chemicals. So I reward myself periodically for things like Wednesday or making out of the house on time(or within seventeen minutes of on time). *I have to tag on red wine and martinis-extra dirty,extra olives here...namely because I am not a lush and don't want my occasional liquor indulgence to have it's own entry.* Definitely guilty pleasures as well-taken in moderation. Not to be savored together. Strongly, truly ill-advised. Never tried it-just CAN'T be a good thing...

4. Dancing it Out- I say this all the time...just makes me feel better about almost anything. If you have questions on the Cathartic Funk movement sweeping the nation- you can peep at my Dancing it Out(courtesy of Grey's) blog.

5. Two hour baths. These are much harder to come by...but when I have uninterrupted ME time...this is what calls my name the loudest. Favorite music, alternating bubble gum, classic or historical fiction/biography novel, fig scented candle and scenty bubbles...quite possibly my favorite guilty pleasure...One or two steamy hot water refills necessary. Plus I can indulge in other listed items simultaneously...multitasking at it's prune toed best (such an odd phenomenon-really).

6. Music,books and stationary. I worked for a short time at Barnes and Noble...but I had to give it up because my book addiction was swallowing my already meager paychecks whole. (Employment by Sephora, MAC, or Nordstrom would be even less lucrative. I would have to pay THEM every two weeks to support my habit). Ideally I want a cozy library in my house at some point (preferably with huge windows and a fireplace). Comfort and assurance in being surrounded by literary greatness. Also, Cd's. Have to giggle at this...I am mocked regularly for hanging on to the whole disc thing. Call it nostalgia, call it distrust of technology- but if my I-Pod is stolen and my computer crashes...(and knowing me, both are possibilities if not likelihoods)- I will still have my music, backed up with the original disc for insurance purposes. And you, Smarty Pants? Play your cards right- and if you beg and do the "You were right-I was wrong" dance (in cute boots of course)- I just MIGHT let you borrow my CD's.

7. Pathetic how much I talk about this...but Coffee HAS to make the list. I guess the guilty part of it is the five assorted flavored creamers I have to dress it up. You know,accessorize. Coffee's destiny is not only to coat your spirit in a liquid fountain of soothing, melty warmth...there IS that. But it also has to taste delish and look fantastic. I have a team of coffee mugs ranging from polka dotted to retro Central Perk to ensure my coffee looks its java-y best. Like a glam-squad for Joe. Where did that name come from? I just like to say that...oh just me and joe...doin' our thing. Chillin'. How we roll...ANYWAY...

8. Chick Flicks...that makes me so unique (just like EVERY other girl) Among my current favorites? Anything by Cameron Crowe, starring John Cusak or Johnny Depp, Audrey Hepburn...musicals...Steel Magnolias,When Harry Met Sally, P.S.- I Love You, About Last Night, Before Sunrise,Singles, Twilight, Definitely, Maybe...and now Notebook is edging it's way onto the list...I just saw it this year for the first time. Haven't met a lot of dramas or romantic comedies I didn't like. Insert knowing nod here. I am aware *hanging head in sad disillusioned generic shame*. I will be purchasing my PREDICTABLE tee tomorrow...at least I can get it in red with sparkle in an effort to redeem myself from a lifetime of sameness.

9. Have to follow that with something that not EVERYONE does... aside from the obvious chips and salsa, hot and sour soup addiction...I season and spice everything. I am a chef's worse nightmare. I blame my mother's flair for the ordinary when it came to cooking...but I adore Taco Bell hot sauce,(ESPECIALLY now that the little packets resemble comical fortune cookies)green Tobasco, Cholula, that spicy Asian chili sauce with the squeezy bottle and green top...you name it...I have applied it to something unexpected. One of my favs? Popcorn with Frank's Red Hot...just drizzled and shaken. Soggy anything is unshiny. I am just saying...

10. Accessories...shoes, earrings,bracelets, necklaces, scarves, hats, sunglasses, belts...the list is endless...There are limitless possibilities! Reinvention, mood enhancement, glamourization...I am a strong believer in the theory (that I think I just generated) that you could wear a potato sack (not that there would be ANY point in that) if you dress it up (in my love...kudos Madonna without an inexplicable British accent) razzle dazzle it...with a little bling...even if you bought it at Target...or GAP (no one has to know and so what if they did?;)).

Thanks for indulging me (another bad joke)-

When I started this list I thought that it would be pure drudgery coming up with ten indulgences...but I could have gone on...lucky for you I am operating under preset parameters. Regardless, guilty pleasures...we all have them, whether they be behaviors, interests, edible, musical...tiny tingly indulgences we steal away for ourselves. Simple pleasures that keep us energized. Markers that keep us from losing our flair (and our sanity) to the daily hustle and bustle...let's start a petition to lose the "guilty" from the "pleasure"...seems undeserved.

So...that is my list.Hopefully it was slightly more fascinating than a dissertation on the nailing of the 95 Theses. Share yours? May make my next list...

June 19, 2009

Had a CRAZY Dream...

Dream-sperts (I am not certain there is their official title-but why Google it when you can just make it up your own self...how educated am I?) say that we dream every single night...and that if we want to search for relevance in our dreams we should document them and then consult "reputable" dream resources. It is said that our dreams utilize a portion of the brain-subconscious that we do not use during our waking hours (some say as much of 90% of our brains lie dormant-there are days when we could all use that brain mass-Yes? Not just speaking for myself here am I?Is this not a democracy...). Dreamologists (I did it again) also say that a chunk of what we dream about is something we came into contact with over the past forty-eight hours of living...So there is that as well. As a non-expert seems to me that a lot of that IS relevant- but also what you consumed before bed-be it pinot noir, vitamins or chicken wings...and waking up mid sleep=crazy(ER) train dreams.

Keeping all of that in mind...take out your notebooks...oh Freuds in training. Analysis required please.

So last night- I nodded off at one a.m.- and then was awakened at 2:30 a.m. for spider check...(periodic part time position-inquire within) after which, I went back to sleep on the couch this time-should the creepy crawlies return. It was then, nestled uncomfortably against the remote that I had said CRAZY dream...

The sun was just reaching it's mark in the morning sky ...the birds were sing-squawking outside my window...let me just add here that for whatever reason- the birds 'round here are in insane abundance...a bit more Hitchcockesque than Snow White animated blue birds. Taking my set queue I drag myself from the embrace of my cloud-like sinky bed and face the day utterly against my will.

Coffee in hand I shuffle to the bathroom and make the usual preparations

...you know the drill...shower-lotion-potion-dress-
Apply my NATURALlook with the skilled stealth of a liner brush wielding ninja...nothing too exciting so far...

Anyway donned in a technicolor off the shoulder moss green sun dress I don't own but should- I dry my hair and style it...Here it is...are you ready? *hands shaking*

I look my reflection over for final approval reacting with chagrin at the end result...

and so- I pull out an electric shaver and proceed to buzz cut the offending side of my hair at the temple. Imagine Edward Scissorhands with razors for fingers...

That's the end...

I didn't LIKE my hair so I said "What the heck-I will SHAVE it OFF"...(Not recommended even if conducted by trained professionals)

ME- baffled and shaken (not stirred)...you...giving me answers to my CRAZY dream?

Ready, set...analyze.

June 11, 2009

Heart for RENT-It's Musically Delicious

~Sigh~ I just got back from RENT.

Aside from the living I have yet to do the dreams to fulfill, the goodbyes to say, the mistakes to correct, the babies t raise...and... well anyway-ASIDE from ALL that I could die now...

I could pass from this life as a shiny, enraptured, tingly, big kneed girl (Serious dancing injury. Not professional- but EVERY bit as well deserved. I tried to help JT bring sexy back...instead I ended up with elephantitus of the knee...pretty AND typical.. haha...MOST importantly-TEMPORARY. Please let the Doc be right on that one thing- I am not partial to the unsightly-especially in the center of one of my longest limbs).

I LOVE RENT!-the musical...( not real life rent. Promoted (?) to a mortgage...don't so much love that). I JUST DO...let me lay it out as simply as I can for those of you who don't speak musical. RENT is to musicals what that first turn your head, twist your tongue, day your dreams crush was to your freshman year. RENT is that high school boy or girl that filled the lunchroom with coolness (Edward style) and your tummy with butterflies. The one that didn't make much sense upon the first encounter(which didn't matter cause they glam'd you with their you don't know any better than to turn and run-ness) but then once you start to hear the tick and watch the tock...you realize that it is too late. You're hooked.

Similarity ENDS there- because at least for me (sophomore year) it was a quick painful fall from that point to where I could actually see the void through the creep.

But not RENT it goes from razzle dazzling (that is from Chicago-more musical lingo. Taking notes?) to singing your soul...(we ALL want that- even if noone told you yet. Oprah will get around to enlightening you. Give her a chance. Um...I am lying. Don't listen...)and as a result liquifying you into melty idealistic romanticness and submitting you into the ugly cry. Which you can hide (not at all) discreetly by smothering your mouth daintily with your hands...the rest is why God gave us MAC and Dior...

Tiny bit of background. RENT is a Pulitzer prize, multi Tony award winning rock opera (including Best Musical) based on the friendships and romances of a group of twenty-something Bohemians set on Avenue B in New York City's lower east side in the late 1980's.These young artists must not only face the harshly difficult reality of being relevant as artists and sacrificing adult comfort and luxury for their art, but they must also learn to survive and succeed at life and love under the crushing oppression of AIDS (as if there wasn't enough existing adversity!) The music and lyrics were written by Jonathan Larson who sadly, suddenly and poetically passed as the new bloom of his efforts was just beginning to open. The concept of the play was adapted from Giacomo Puccini's opera La Boheme about a group of young artists who must find their place in the face of Tuberculosis...there are numerous plot parallels to the opera. Musetta's Waltz, a song from La Boheme is mentioned directly and Goodbye Love is closely paralleled to the opera as well. In the song-La Vie Boheme- Bohemia is the daughter of Mother Earth and the song celebrates full out catchy rocker style- the contributions in the form of poignancy and flavor that artists and their work have brought to living. Imagine lots of costuming, MTV style choreography (pre stupid non reality-reality shows) high kicks and flash. Heaps of catchy yet deep lyrics- guitars and drums,...romance in every form imaginable and SO much sassy it makes your head spin. I must apologize for failing RENT miserably at this point.

Oh oh oh! but I have to shout out here that in addition to clearly knowing the craft part of his work- Larson knew his setting. He wrote about New York...it doesn't get better! He incorporated real locations like the Life Cafe from his own life in NYC. Mark and Roger's living conditions closely mirrored Larson's own with the fire in the trash can, bathtub in the middle of a large one room apartment etc. Oh and like Mark, Larson's girlfriend also left him for a woman. All this mayhem and chaos is fun and fabulously rocklicious and soulful. If RENT tours your city (it closed as the eighth longest running show on Broadway after a treasured twelve year run)see it! RENT is currently touring with the two original leads playing the roles of Mark(Anthony Rapp)and Roger(Adam Pascal)one of the best bromances in history. Pinkie swear...Before you go-do a little research and buy and learn the soundtrack.

This is stellar advice;) (attained through personal experience) for any musical goer (novice or otherwise)-for any show. This eliminates catch up and when the plot is expressed in song because REALLY- what in life isn't? Your culture cash will be better spent and you will appreciate and relish the performance indescribably more. Especially with regards to RENT...You will still catch the gist of Damn Yankees even if you never google or download it...you just won't fully appreciate Whatever Lola Wants...RANDOM! Call my name and I shall appear!

I leave you with this...RENT is best known for Seasons of Love. All the songs are fantastic! My personal play-list:
One Song Glory
Light My Candle
Out Tonight
Another Day
La Vie Boheme A and B
I Should Tell You
Take Me or Leave Me
Without You
Goodbye Love
I'll Cover You (reprise) I ESPECIALLY love this SAD-BEAUTIFUL one makes the heart on my sleep drip love...it JUST does...
Your Eyes

Mmmmmm...so instead of dying in my Bohemian musical ecstasy enhanced daze just now...I think I will just drift off now with visions of the RENT cast rocking in my head. Wishing you the same. Share the LOVE!

June 1, 2009

I Don't Want To Do List

Today is a gloomy summer Monday. Those should be forbidden. Anyway in the spirit of the weather...I am disgruntled...heehee...just like the way that word sounds and I don't even work for the post office. But still, I'm a tad disgruntled. I have been living life on the slacker side as of late so I have an untidy pile or two of undesirable tasks piled up in the corner...shrieking for my attention. I don't do well with shrieking...unless I am a party to it and it is in celebration of something shriek-worthy. Under less desirable circumstances,I would typically just avoid/flee from the shrieker (source of the insidious shrieking). In this case,I am risking getting my grown up card yanked... so I guess I will have to go with option two. Rather than avoidance I will beat it down Ali style (which means I get to mock, taunt and curse at it until it is down for the count...while remaining shiny. I'm Gonna'Knock You Out. Huah! Sparkle... Things are starting to look up.) So here is my list of victims...

1. Stripping. *buckabuckawowow*...(wait for it, wait for it...) The Beds...Not a huge deal, but just like the laundry I am far more skilled at the washing and drying part...Not a Martha at folding, hanging and hospital corners...Think her cellmate had potpourri made of orange peels and cinnamon from Tuesday's prison lunch? Just wondering...White collar crimes are bizarre that way...Remember the Sesame Street song? "One of these prisoners is doing her own thing...one of these inmates doesn't belong"...and poor Martha is in the bottom right quadrant attempting to crease her jump suit with the side of a laceless shoe...next to Maude the homicidal trucker under Yasmin the Black widow...diagonal from Butchy the mulleted woman who keeps chewing her face. Anyway...the beds. Platform free. Reserve those for Wednesday afternoons when it's hailing. Allegedly...

2. Packing...as in send myself packing. to the left, to the left...everything I own in a (suitcase) to the left. Love that song- but flick me if I ever attempt to purchase another Beyonce Cd (in the spirit of J-Lo's-three quality song limit per cd)hooray for single song purchase on I-Tunes and the movie crossover thingy for saving their careers...Think I have mentioned this all important life lesson previusly...Actually I am packing for a wedding(for which I will indubitably pack the wrong shoes or the wrong underwear...cursed by the Lack of Options Plague) and my Munchkins are staying with family so I have to pack them too. I abhor packing...I am so bashing the mommas of the smurf sized travel bottles while throwing elbows at the garment bag and sucker punching my army style rolled wrinkle free clothing (if there is such a thing I don't think I would own it because it probably also includes an adjustable waist...things clothes shouldn't posess for $500 please Alec. Btw...that rolly trick doesn't work for me either)...In the same spirit I need to go through all the kiddos clothes and pack up everything that they have outgrown. That one is going to have to shriek in my ear a bit longer...both monotonous and sad...sniff sniff- they grow like adorable little mutants at lightening speed. Or in New Moon speak- like werewolves. If it's not a vampire though, it's JUST not worth it...just ask Bella. Forget it what does she know? Ask me! Teehee.

3. Start my intensive Summer Workout Program. I really DO need to get going on this...my fascinating,alluring and tempting options are get up at the plumber's crack of dawn armed with taser to ward off the coyotes and walk REALLY far (and probably get lost) because I don't run unless I am being chased or challenged. Even then my she-go still only does sprints. Gutsy not stupid. Even I am not crazy enough to marathon...OR I can stay up extra late and work out then...this is much more likely to occur. Rather than walking fast and fighting wildlife at midnight I will engage in yoga and cardio training in the form of the twenty or so various dance related workout DVDs (Curse of the Grown Up Cheerleader)in my possession-ranging from Carmen Electra to the Core Dance Training set I got conned into by Len Goodman and insomnia...Regardless...I may lose the "intensive" part...but the Summer Workout must go on...I am apologizing in advance to my hair which I will soon be sleeping on directly after washing...I will make it up to you somehow. New hat? New do? New product? We'll work out the details later...

This is just the tip of my To Do iceberg. But I have to start somewhere..."Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow?" Mark Twain. A procrastinator after my own heart.

*Deep breath- in through the nose, out through the mouth. Sniff...hooooo*
Okay! Ready..."Fly like a butterfly, sting like a bee-ish"

Just as soon as I finish my second cup of coffee...