Underwhelming

The basic theme of the play "Our Town" Is that life is not in the big moments, but the moments in between. All the moments that we take for granted. I think about that a lot. I find myself so caught up in the trials and the tribulations of daily life that I often forget to appreciate the moments that make my life rich. Not the vacations and the holidays and the events that I seem to look forward to, but in the way my daughter sings songs exactly the way that I sing them, or that my son tries so very hard to be a "good boy" even though it is so very difficult for him. Even in the history that I share with my husband, the way that he can make me laugh even when I feel that we have lost touch.

What a waste I think it is that I am always looking ahead. Not seeing what is directly in front of me. Knowing that I have a blind eye when it comes to life, does not seem to be enough to keep it in perspective. I seem to be forever seeking the next thrill...but being immune somehow to the richness of my life...and it is. Rich I mean.

Perspective. What a waste it is, when it is gained only in hindsight. Why is it that we appreciate the most blessed times of our lives...only when they have passed. Reminiscing...I want to find a way to gain perspective when I can still hold, touch, feel. sense the moment...not to only appreciate the richest moments when they are past...I need to wake up and drink it all in when these experiences are still attainable, not when they have fallen out of reach...when regret sets in.

I want to be overwhelmed by the richness in my life. Not underwhelmed by its lack of adventure, or disappointed by its sameness. I want to APPRECIATE the beauty of this moment. There is no promise of the next.