Jealousy

Jealousy...

(to give credit where credit is due...this blog is straight up Gray's Anatomy Format...which I used to absolutely adore, but it has gone a bit ER-ish on me and if I wasn't hooked on the characters and if I weren't completely OCD- I would switch it off...:0) )

We have all had jealous friends, jealous boyfriends or girlfriends, a jealous spouse...and assuming that we are all human, we have all been a bit jealous...seen green (not money green, but green eyed monster green).

We have been envious of the time or attention that someone we care about spends with someone else...or the fabulous shoes, great body, amazing hand bag...the hooker passing us on the street is sporting...Regardless to be human-is to have experienced jealousy in various forms.

As women, we claim we don't like it when men act jealous. We pretend it's a burden. What happens however, when the one we love is not jealous? This raises all sorts of questions. Does he just trust me or is he not in love with me anymore? Does he still find me attractive? Is he bored?Is he not passionate about me? Is he cheating?

This issue was raised by someone close to me. She has had an on again, off again relationship with the same boy for years and he used to be jealous, CRAZY jealous. This was an attribute that used to make her grit her teeth and make the hair stand up on the back of her neck. Because even when they weren't together she could not so much as speak to another guy without ruffling his feathers.

They have been slowly reopening the door between friendship and romance for awhile now...so they are on uncertain ground. She goes out and talks to cute boys with her girlfriends last night, tells him about it expecting what WAS the usual envy drunk reaction and he remains unruffled. Now she wants to know why the boy who used to bang on her door and call her twenty times worrying about where she is and who she is talking to...now is unfazed that she had a flirtation with another man.

Men are constantly talking about out double standards. Are they really double standards? Or do we just act put out by jealousy for the benefit of our friends and secretly relish the attention being showered upon us in the form of barbarism?..teehee...that is a joke! Although, let's be honest- we wouldn't mind our men clubbing the Violator over the head and dragging us back to the cave by our hair for a wild love by the fire...

Although jealousy can make people crazy...in moderation-it can fuel passion, show interest, hold our attention. No woman wants a pouty man-boy sulking in the corner because some beau smiled in our general direction, but a "who was that guy?" every once in awhile is not only good for us as women because we know he still gives a dookie-but it is good for our man as well. We want him to know that "we we still got it" and he better recolize (haha)...

Something to the old "moderation in all things" adage. Like a shot of Grand Marnier in a top shelf margarita- a touch of jealousy gives both sexes the kick we crave in a relationship- can keep the home fires burnin' (or the cave fires as the case may be).